Fearless Kinky

I was tied on the tall steel bed.

There were 2 men and 1 woman with their sacred tools.

I felt the fear as my body was shaking.

I couldn’t run.

No where.

No way.

My heart was pounding feeling excitement.

Who are they?

What are they going to do?

I didn’t know this place.

I dreamt.

My training in the dream.

It is the Red Room with sophisticated architecture & lighting.

Fear with excitement without breath - I experienced

Looking inside, into the unconscious, into my fears and triggers and pain, to admit that actually take freaky joy in standing in that pile of trembling.

This is an insight that can be very, very offensive to my egos: the idea that on some level I could want or enjoy “awful” things in my lives is scary.

I tend to think we only want or enjoy “good” things, or that we should only want “good” things.

But acknowledging our secret bliss in “the bad stuff” doesn’t have to be a troubling recognition; it’s just a normal part of human nature.

We all do it, and there doesn’t need to be any shame or blame in it at all.

In fact, setting aside shame and blame is what allows us to make the enjoyment conscious, and thereby lets us remove its power to sneakily control us.

This is a very important insight to integrate into how we live our lives.

The minute that we’re willing to make that previously unconscious pleasure a conscious one, the minute we’re willing to deliberately celebrate it.

We create a massive pattern interrupt. 🎉

We allow ourselves to finally receive the “secret joy” that unbeknownst to ourselves!

We let the desire that motivated the negative pattern be fully known and satisfied, and then we’re free to move beyond it and create something new.

Often, the sensations that we experience as terrible or painful are just pleasure without approval.

Mysterious and desirable, explore new sensations and fall deep into your own senses.

It is Fearless Kinky, New Boundaries.